We're greatly influenced by each other and its very difficult to break out of a box when others are sitting on top of it. Psychological enmeshment is deadly and the way to understand and eventually break free from it is to look at how you may need the approval and attention of others. Or of when you fear their reaction.
Who would you be if your family, job and posessions were taken from you? And if you were outcast from society with only your own thoughts and nature to keep you company? Would you cry, die or go crazy? Or would you be more determined to become your best and to find out what's really true?
It's a fake world out there when you consider that it's built by people unable to relate from a place of authenticity within themselves. In fact do you know of anybody that can? Do you know of anyone who can honestly relate without being somewhat defensive or hidden within themselves?
That feeling of defense is our clutching onto sadness. The sadness and fear of not feeling love from others and of doubting our own place within the world. This sadness is the root of other behavioural dysfunctions such as anger, jealousy, resentment, greed and lust. So the root of all "evil" is the perceived lack of love. And the reverse of perception is caused by distrust. A distrust that's initiated in our childhood when we became confused as to how our parents are telling us one thing but emoting another. So they could be telling us they love us whilst at the same time feeling or emoting the pain and angst of their own internal sufferings. We then as children come to feel this as 'not love' and therefore can't fully trust what our parents or other people say to us. This is when we started looking to things out there to give us that feeling of love, warmth and the security of belonging.
This early distrust forms the basis of all misperception and is why the world has come to glorify the negative and shun the good and true. It's a world that accepts the gross and the impure for sustenance whilst doubting and disbelieving in the possability of anything else. This is why it's not always easy to relate spiritual concepts to people who haven't had the direct experience in their adulthood of being inwardly free and unnatached to worldly things. And well the spiritual lot aren't always the best example to follow anyway as most of us are still very much working through our own pains and misperceptions.
So where then do we turn? Well, inwardly of course with great focus and desire for resolve. Life then will respond and bring to our experience the insights, people and information needed to progress our freedom from off this wheel of continual suffering. There is no right or wrong religious or spiritual path, its each to our own. Whatever we vibe with best.
My own teacher I appreciated him most of all because inside I knew he was telling the truth. And each time he spoke it was as if he were speaking directly to the inner most part of me. That's a sign of knowing. Try not to fall for the hype of the intellectually superior or the holier than though brigade. This just caters to the ego. To a sense of change without really trying. Superficial clinging and a vain sense of betterment. No worse than trancing out in front of the TV and stuffing your face with fake chemical laden foodstuffs.
To some however this is bliss and freedom of having our own dweling place and ability to do what we want alongside the people in life that we love. And well if that's our choice, it's not wrong. But for others we know it's not the overall answer that helps free ourselves to be what we know we can be and to express trully the feeling of love we have within. In fact it's the TV, fake foodstuffs, the impure emotional attachments and cravings for sex that keep us begging at the bowl of lifes misery. Keeps us on and on through life with nothing really improving other than perhaps our material aquisitions and ideas of status amongst other likewise beggars who will argue to the death in order to maintain their slovenly ideals and fake sense of self.
It's not easy to engage with peoples denials as it's the defense they've built due to the aforementioned lack of love. A defense fortified by their personality over time and their place within society enmeshed amongst the likewise attitudes and pains of other people around them. "Just another brick in the wall", as sung by Pink Floyd. The wall of denial, defensiveness and control magnified from person through all society.
In truth we control nothing, nothing can be controlled. Trying to control results in greater anguish within ourselves. Sure we can organise and take care of our lives but there's a difference when we try to hold on and control. Control is a cold and deadly restriction of our life force and serves to entrap the lives and souls of those we feel we need. Let go of control and learn to trust each other whilst improving upon ourselves, resolving our behavioural dysfunctions and the sadness that lies beneath it all.
Welcome then to a new world. A brave new world as my old teacher calls it. For it takes bravery to admit our failings and to open up to the vulnerability of our soul so that we can again feel love and bring real love into the world. A love untarnished by motive, greed and agenda. A love that need not cling to or control other people. A love expressed openly and playfully amongst each other healing each our hurts and naturally helping us evolve beyond the darkness that has had a great grip of our hearts and of this world for far too long now.
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Ronnie
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